The Tough Guy

Domestic Violence is a problem, or rather has been a problem, affecting a tremendous number of people within our nation ever since someone realized two people can inhabit one room. Not to slight other nations, or insinuate that no such problem exists abroad, but I have no numbers to back up any opinion I might form about domestic abuse overseas. I do know that here in the US a disproportionate number of arrestees awaiting arraignment are in jail for family violence assault. I also know that the vast majority of these arrests will never make it to court as the victim will decline to pursue charges. However, there is one story I'd like to share as a lesson on how not to build "cred" in prison. Everyone gets hauled into jail with hands behind their backs and metal bracelets on. A select few are rolled in strapped to a dentist chair on wheels, possibly with a mesh "spit bag" over their heads for being a bit... enthusiastic.

Our gentleman was brought in walking, with his hands behind his back and a fresh golf ball on his forehead. Despite what TV and movies will tell you, it is wholly unnecessary and extremely unwise to start any fights, or stab anyone, or whatever else you see on Oz, in order to demonstrate that you're "nobody's bitch". But with the egg on his head, our AP should have been able to convey that he's so bad he had to be knocked out to get dragged in.

In actuality, he was under arrest for assaulting his wife. Specifically, he grabbed her arms and pinned them to her body, thus preventing her from fighting back. Then, with both appendages thus occupied and utterly unaware of the very concept of the term "kick" tries to headbutt her into submission. The human skull, as we all know, is constructed of some pretty thick bone and serves to protect our brains from impact and trauma.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Skull

The human face, while also pretty hard in some places (try punching someone in the mouth and enjoy the stitches) contains considerably more holes, soft points, and soft organs than the top of your head. So, as our arrestee smashed his face into the top of his wife's head over and over he did cause her pain. He also knocked himself out. She walked away with a headache and a slam dunk divorce case while he was checked for a concussion and taken to jail where he either had to explain to a judge that he beat his wife so viciously that he knocked himself out, or that he beat her so ineptly that he suffered the most damage. Best case scenario, he goes to the mental hospital for evaluation due to self harm.